How to stop worrying and start living

“When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened”  Winston Churchill

Stop worrying and start living. We give this advice to everybody we see tensed even though sometimes we don’t even know why he is worried. We know that worry does not help us in anyway but still we cannot help it. In this article I will answer to questions like why we cannot stop worrying, how worrying harm us and how can we control it?

Constant worrying makes you uncomfortable. It keeps you up whole night and tensed whole day. So why is it so difficult to stop worrying? The answer for this question lies in our mind only. From childhood we condition our mind to think negatively.  We develop the belief that if we don’t worry about the problem then we cannot solve it. E.g. it is expected from every student that they should worry about their exams so that they can study hard and get good marks. We forget that this pressure is responsible for Increase in the number of suicide among students.

Think like this, if you believed that your worrying has many benefit then how would you get rid of it? Your answer is probably that you wouldn’t be willing to, as you might feel like you would be losing something valuable and that giving up worrying would be very costly to you. That’s why a student cannot stop worrying, because he does not want to lose marks.

Another major reason is the fear of unknown. We are always in stress about what will happen in future? We create different scenarios of future and that too always negative. E.g. If economy is down and the job market is bad then employee will start worrying about what if they lose the job? He start thinking like, he won’t be able to pay EMIs or he won’t be able to pay household expense or school fees for his kids. Don’t you think that it will be wise for him that instead of worrying, he should start thinking on improving his skill required for his job or create more sources of income?

We understood why do we worry so much, so now let’s find out how worrying harm us? As I explained earlier, worrying is the kind of negative thinking. Person just focuses on problems and not on solutions, because of which he create more problem for himself. Remember that you will get what you focus on. It is also proven that stress affects our health. Person does not eat properly, he does not sleep properly and entire day he is tensed. We are so worried about future that we stop enjoying our present.

“Every evening I turn my worries over to God. He’s going to be up all night anyway.”  Mary C. Crowley

So in a nutshell if we worry then we do not get the solution and we lose our health also. So let’s find out how we can stop it.

  •  See the end result and accept it. – This is my favorite exercise. If you are worried about any problem then see what worst could be possible. Accept the worst situation and start working on how you can save yourself from that. E.g. If you are worried about losing your job then start saving 6 months expense to help you in emergencies. This savings can help you in paying your EMIs and other expenses while you can focus on searching new job.
  • Do the relaxation exercises – You can listen to relaxation tapes or can do meditation. It will help you in releasing all the negativity. You can also do deep breathing. Body and mind will be rejuvenated and you will get energy to fight against any stress.
  • Leave it to God – Always believe that whatever happens, happens for the best. Whenever you feel lost in dark always remember that God is with you holding your hand. Do whatever you can do and leave everything else to god.
  • Share it with your close ones – It is said that you will feel relax when you share your problems. Let your family and friends know, what is troubling you. Sometimes they might not be able to help you but they will definitely give you moral support.
  • Use your subconscious mind – Instead of becoming slave of mind, make it work for you. Before going to sleep, ask your mind for the solution and then go to the deep sleep. Our conscious mind might not be aware of everything but our subconscious mind does know everything. You will get the answer through inner voice or through some external hint.

Remember that no matter what life gives you, you can turn it around.

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